Spilled Milk is my monthly wrap up where I talk about some of my favourite things from the last month. Things I’m reading, enjoying, looking forward to—sort of anything floating my boat.
As I sat down to write this, I was thinking February was kind of a wash… And then I remembered all the things that have happened in just 29 days.
Here is an overview of how my month went:
I hard launched this Substack!!! One small step for queer people with a Substack, one giant leap for me (is this the new podcasting? Only time will tell). It’s wild to think that I’ve started publishing writing online again, but it also feels correct?
Along those same lines, I wrote a piece for Solitary’s Anniversary issue. It was such an honour to be included with so many talented writers, and I love my denim jacket tribute! Thank you again for having me
🩷I hit 25k words on my second novel (!!!!!!!). Writing a new project while querying my first book feels like driving through really thick fog—it’s getting me to my destination, but is definitely an odd and scary experience. I’m really excited about this book. It’s different and weird and gross and fun!
I painted my kitchen a dusty blue like the one in the cottage of Kate Winslet’s character from The Holiday. After years of yearning for Scandi minimalism and mid-century modern curation, I’m leaning into English countryside eclectic and it feels really good. Let the knicks knack baby!
I understand the science behind leap years, but the whole thing feels extremely kooky. One extra day every four years? And you’re telling me a time travel romance novelist didn’t come up with it? Either way, I guess I’m grateful to have had the extra day last month.
The following is a list of some things I couldn’t get enough of.
What I Read and Loved
Greenland by David Santos Donaldson
More people need to be talking about this book!! It’s the story of Kip, a Black queer writer, writing the story of E.M. Forster’s Black queer secret lover, Mohammed el Adl. Both of these characters are other in their lives, confront whiteness via their white partners, and ultimately crave being seen.
We follow Kip as he faces a looming deadline and a quest to find his voice, all while grappling with his growing connection to his subject. Interspersed between Kip’s tumble into obsession, we get bits of this unfolding novel within a novel that are imbued with projections from his own life and relationships.
The way the narratives weave in and out of each other is a feat of craft. This book is weird, meta in a way that really worked for me, and has stayed with me long after reading. Let’s just say the urgency this writer feels to leave a trace on the world hit very close to home!
Homebodies by
This book was at the top of my I-can’t-read-this-while-writing-my-own-queer-coming-of-age-contemporary-literary-fiction-novel pile, and I’m so glad I finally got to it. It’s the story of what happens when a young Black queer writer loses the job in media “a million girls would kill for.”
I think Tembe Denton-Hurst could have written a very good modern version of The Devil Wears Prada, but I’m so glad this book is much much more than that. While it is a book about working in media (which is essentially the glossies for the modern age), it’s first and foremost a gorgeous character study of a Black and queer person living today. Through her coming of age, there are poignant discussions of identity, jealousy, commodification, and the idea of selling out. Andy Sachs could never.
What also felt extremely resonant in this book was the dissonance between who you are, who you say you are, and who others see you as. This idea is exponentially more complicated when the concept of family and old friends is added to the mix. Homebodies is such a great addition to the contemporary queer canon, and I’m so glad it exists!
75 Hard Style Challenge
Consider this an ongoing dispatch from my shopping hiatus for the next few months.
When I saw @oldloserinbrooklyn talk about her 75 Hard Style Challenge back in January, I didn’t consider participating (no shopping for 75 days didn’t (still doesn’t) sound like something I am capable of). But then I started seeing a bunch of creators tap in, rediscover a love for their clothes, and somehow I found myself deciding to do it.
My kickoff date was February 15th. Why? Well, it happened to be the last day of the SSENSE sale. I made one final purchase I’ve been considering for a while, and put my credit cards away.
The first thing I wanted to do was go digging in the depths of my closet to find pieces I could fall in love with all over again. My conclusion was: I have so many good pants! Something else I did was bring some boots that needed fixing to a cobbler. They’ve been sitting in a bag at the back of my hall closet for years… And now I can wear them again!
I’ve been tempted to cheat a bunch, but haven’t yet. Rediscovery and honing my taste is what I’m looking for and, so far, I’m enjoying that part of the process.
Here are some creators I’ve recently discovered and have loved getting inspiration from for this challenge (they’re not doing it, they just have IT): @atiyacwalcott for brilliant unlikely pairings and a perfectly crafted aesthetic, @hanselkai for a dedication to classics and quality, @newyorkphan for a sense of whimsy, and @g_..ma for an incredible layering prowess.
Bagels
Not to be sooooo Nara Smith and “my husband asked me to make bagels from scratch” core, but I am currently obsessed with making bagels.
The only baking I’ve ever been good at was when I made bread during season 1 of the pandemic, but I adapted a bagel recipe that makes it really easy (even for us stand-mixer-less girlies).
I’m not going to share the recipe here (unless someone asks!!!!) because, again, I’m not a baker! My cooking skills include and are limited to: soups, stews, bread, and now, bagels.
All this to say, I recommend trying your hand at bagels—it’s really fun and easy!
Reading Goals Update
My non-fiction read for the month was Men by Raven Smith. SO FUNNY! One of the most unique voices I’ve ever read. I was two essays into this collection when I ordered his other book.
My poetry collection read this month was Homie by Danez Smith. Gorgeous, singular, moving. This collection is so dynamic, plays with form, is so staunch in its identity—I can’t wait to read more from them!
I finished James Baldwin’s Go Tell It on the Mountain. It was great! I’m excited to do power rankings of all his books and see where each of them land. I still think it’ll be impossible to dethrone Giovanni’s Room (which is my next Baldwin read).
That’s been my month!
Here’s a rapid fire of what else is on my radar:
The Maggie Rogers renaissance is coming, and I’ve already been playing her on repeat.
Doing a Kristen Stewart marathon, and so far Charlie’s Angels (2019) isn’t as bad as I remembered? KStew kinda eats…
Also doing a Jodie Foster marathon… diving into Nyad for the first time so watch this space.
^So excited to revisit the Jodie x Kristen crossover event that was Panic Room!
Beyoncé going country!!!!
In my aforementioned closet clean out, I rediscovered a pair of brown corduroy pants that I’ve worn a bunch since!
Maggie Nelson! I am finally going to read a Maggie Nelson book this month. Every queer person with an English degree is really mad I haven’t yet…
Until next time 🤠
ok tell me why you haven’t let me try a bagel
As a fellow bagel maker I’d like to know the recipe!